23 flavors “from agency websites, agent blogs and the AgentQuery forums.” Get a spoon and dig in.

If you’d like to jump over to the other side of rejection, watch this first of several vlogs, Fridays With Agent Kristin: “Episode 1: How To Become A Literary Agent.”

“‘Fiction novel’ is an automatic rejection. This is not a mistake I ever overlook. It’s not a typo. It’s a fundamental misunderstanding of what two words mean, and it’s a HUGE RED FLAG for bad writing… If you grew up in juvenile detention and murdered your first three husbands, stir fried your cats and enrolled your children in Fagin’s School for Thieves, I’m ok with it. The ONLY thing I care about is whether your novel is enticing. Sadly, it’s not. And it’s a fiction novel, so it doesn’t even really exist.”
— The Query Shark (Janet Reid)
“In truth, there isn’t a single most common error that puts me off a query letter… It’s never about one thing in the letter. It’s about every facet of the query letter as a whole. And even then, if you put the same good query letter in front of 10 different agents, all 10 of them might have a different response. And some would ask for sample pages and the others wouldn’t.”
— Kristin Nelson on what makes a successful (or unsuccessful) query letter.

Stood out:

3) I have written two trilogies, a novella, and one cook book that I would like to publish.

7) Melanie thought she knew everything she had to know about men.

8) You rejected my first novel when you were an editor at Doubleday…

“If you’re working on your query and finding it hard to come up with something that makes your book sound special, maybe it’s that your book isn’t special.”
— Jessica Faust, literary agent

Note: this has to do with July, August and the start of September.

Weeks to Avoid: July 11, 18% on vacation, July 25, 11% on vacation, August 1, 11% on vacation, September 5 (week of Labor Day), 10% on vacation, September 12, 13% on vacation.

The Best Weeks: August 15, 6% on vacation; August 22, 4% on vacation.”

What’s a couple more weeks of editing to be certain?

Remember kids, always have a back-up copy, or a see-through briefcase with extra battery.

When he couldn’t get the agent to accept it, the writer took matters into his own hands and dropped off a valise containing a computer on which the script had been saved, cops said.

He also left behind instructions on how to retrieve the manuscript.

But worried workers wondered what was really in the briefcase, so a security guard took it out to an alleyway near the agency.

The police bomb squad followed up, and blew the briefcase to Kingdom Come before realizing it contained only the unwanted movie script, cops said.”

00:05… 00:04… 00:03… 00:02… 00:01… 00:00 seconds of fame.

Jessica Faust’s advice: don’t spend the time writing the sequel or full series until you are under contract with the first book. In the meantime, move onto new work.

“To be honest, even the crappiest (apparently word of the day) book should be getting requests because a good query, like a good car salesman, can sell anything. If you aren’t getting any requests on 20 queries (that means at least one request for every 20 queries you send), you need to rewrite your query. It’s not working.”
— Jessica Faust, literary agent (BookEnds), in reference to an author who received 120 rejections on query alone (not one agent requested a partial).

“He targeted would-be writers who wanted their works to be converted into film and TV programmes, or would-be investors interested in putting money into film projects.

The main loser was an elderly man so keen to have his work published he handed over almost £300,000 to Price, remortgaging his home and borrowing money to do so.”

You’re going to want to take this call (email)

… And I’m back.

By the way, wanted to direct you to a post from Rachelle Gardner. If you don’t know her, she’s a literary agent.

Her frustration-suggestion: provide a way for an agent to contact you. This doesn’t mean via a post-comment. An email address. She mentioned there are times when she’s visited a writer’s website only to find no way to start a dialogue (not necessarily to represent but to connect).

To be honest, I am surprised but happy to hear agents make contact outside of usual submission processes.

So do yourself a favor, make it easy on them. You might be opening more than one door.

Take a shot: The Knight Agency is holding a contest to look for their next client. (Last year they ended up signing two.)

THE QUICKIE SUMMARY: Visit the “OFFICIAL SPEED DATE 2 POST” on Monday, March 7th and leave your name in the comment section from 12pm ET to 1pm ET. We will assign everyone a number who left a comment during the specified entry period and draw 125 contestants using Random.org. The 125 intial entrants will be announced on the blog by the end of the business day and asked to email the first three pages of their manuscript to Contests@KnightAgency.net. Deidre and Pamela will then join forces to whittle the 125 contestants down to 3 finalists over the following days.

At the end of the contest, we will also award a first chapter critique to one of the initial 125 entrants via random drawing who was not selected as a finalist.

So you know:

  • Round 1 (initial entry, March 7th): You will need to submit the first three pages the next day if drawn.
  • Round 2 (March 10th, if chosen): first 10 pages
  • Round 3 (March 14th, if chosen): first three chapters
  • Round 4 (March 17th, if chosen): full manuscript

One of the most interesting things to observe in people is how their self-image contradicts the image others have of them.

Almost all powerful characters can be described as hypocrites to some extent, because few are so self-aware that they understand all their own flaws and foibles.

Let your characters show themselves through what they do, and let their words contradict their behavior whenever possible to reveal even deeper character.

— Rachelle Gardner, literary agent, WordServe Literary.
“Requested material” is not what you put on something if I’ve said “sure, send a query.”  A query is never requested material. You don’t need permission to send me a query.”
— Janet Reid, literary agent at FinePrint Literary Management.